A Failed Act of Kindness of A Girl Who Wanted to Donate Blood But Couldn't

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mischa
gices
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People often talk in public or in private about their good deeds. Some of them may just want to show off, but I still think it is good to talk about it as it spreads awareness about problems in our society. However, you barely read about someone, who failed in doing an act of kindness, otherwise they probably wouldn’t put it online. Here’s my story:

I always wanted to donate blood. I am admiring my dad for doing it since years and it is such an easy thing you can do to do good and to save lives.

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The day has come when I took all my courage together and went to the donation centre. I was really nervous. They already told me at the registration that my size and weight are at the limit for a blood donation (I am a girl, quite small and thin).

First it was okay, but then my veins closed and I couldn’t give enough blood. I gave the half of what they needed (250 ml out of 500 ml). They told me that they can’t use it, that they need the full amount. Then I felt weak and got circulatory problems.

I was shattered afterwards - My donated blood was waste.

Nevertheless, I didn’t give up. I tried it two more times. I could give enough blood both times, but they had to stand beside me and fight for the very last drop of blood, before I collapsed due to extreme circulatory problems.

It was embarrassing because all the other donors in the hall, including a doctor and nurses, were looking at me and I heard them whispering "What a pity, if someone really wants to help, but it’s not working.“ That didn’t make it better for me in that moment to be honest. I went through this 3 times in total.

I still want to do it, but I learned to listen to my body. If I get health problems, I can’t save someone.

What I'm really trying to say is...

I don’t want to discourage you to donate blood. Don’t be afraid. All the people were really nice towards me, even the other donors helped me through it and tried to distract me so I wouldn't faint away. Just for this experience it was worth it.

There’s a very good article here on Clever Dodo of someone who successfully donated blood; you should read it.

If I have the courage to go there 3 times, even with health problems, so can you too. Give it at least a try and save lives.

I have another story, in which I wanted to do good, in which I forced myself somehow through it, because I thought I had to do it. It would be too long to tell both stories, but let me tell you this - it was a hard learning and I also had to quit it.

It shows you how difficult it can be to say NO, especially when you are in a situation where you really want to help by heart. My story isn‘t about me telling you how great or good I am or that you shouldn’t do good because you might fail. I want to show that EVEN IF you 'fail‘ in the act, the thought of it is enough and the daily little acts of kindness, like giving someone a smile, have the same value as donating blood.

Do not force yourself to be kind, it should come effortless from within.

A good friend of mine told me once:

You are already doing good when you are not doing bad

Keep that sentence in mind :)

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mischa
mischa Level 1

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gices
gices Level 6

I've been told that regularly donating blood is good not only for saving other people's lives but also for the donor as it allows them to create new fresh blood which is good for the body.

Let me offer a word of advice though...

During my initial days of blood donation, I really wanted to see how I was saving lives. In the UK, they usually send you a text message informing you that your blood has been used for so and so but I had never received any of those messages myself while another donor who I knew had.

That basically got me annoyed as I suppose I was more fixated on the outcome rather than the act itself. Knowing you've just saved a life will make you feel so happy but my donations were not giving me the reward I wanted deep down.

Many people find themselves is similar situations where start to cling onto the outcome without really realising it. They try to do more and more "good acts" not because they want to help but to get their dose of dopamine and feel good about themselves.

It took me some time to realise this and thought it's worth sharing.

Anyway, I know it's a bit more difficult to give blood as a girl let alone being healthy, so it's good to see the effort you're putting to make this happen :)

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